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The Practical Side of God’s Top Ten, Part 2
Last month, the FSM newsletter led with The Practical Side of God’s Top Ten, Part 1, talking about the first three commandments that relate to our relationship with God. If you missed it, you can read that article here. Part 2 of this topic reminds us that God is also concerned with our relationships with each other. People may think, “We have to do these things or we won’t be saved.” But God always knew our behavior would never be good enough to repair our relationship with him or save us. These laws about how we treat each other are not about making us behave. He’s not an angry parent who likes to punish. He’s a loving Father who wants to protect us from our bad choices in this life. That’s the practical side of God's law. God, our loving Father, gave these laws to protect us from the world and our sinful selves. When we look at the Ten Commandments from a practical perspective, and teach that perspective to our children, we see how following them makes life better for all of us.
Our Relationships With Each Other Through the 10 Commandments (within the context of the first three commandments)
Part two of this topic focuses on the seven remaining commandments. As sinful people in a sinful world, we’re constantly messing up our lives and our relationships with pride, selfishness, jealousy, envy, and all the bad choices we make. Doing our best to keep God’s law, even if we can’t keep it perfectly, brings blessings to relationships.
Respect your parents and those in authority. God gives us parents and people in authority for a reason. The world is full of danger, spiritual, physical, and emotional. We are born into this world as very vulnerable creatures. We need help and direction, even if our prideful, independent, sinful selves don’t think we do. God gives us people who will look after us and teach us about Him.
Life has rules. When we go against those rules, our lives are full of conflict at home, school, work, or in society. Going against authority breaks families and can have serious consequences. Living a life of rebellion is exhausting and affects how we see the world and everyone in it. If you want a more peaceful life, don’t make a habit of being rebellious.
Respect and value human life. Valuing life rests on a slippery slope. It’s easy for that value to erode until hurting and killing people becomes easy and meaningless. When entertainment becomes watching people abuse, torture, or kill each other, and abortion is used to fix choices we’ve made that lead to a consequence we knew was possible, when language becomes dark, foul, and mean, people become angry and scared. A society that values all human life is less dangerous, and its people have less fear, worry, and stress. Valuing human life and respecting each other brings security, peace, and contentment.
Respect marriage and sex. In a society where marriage is considered temporary or not essential, and sex is a recreational activity without God’s idea of intimacy between a man and a woman, the family unit, the cornerstone of a society, disintegrates. Many children don’t know their fathers, women get pregnant for selfish reasons, and there is a record number of sexually transmitted diseases, some that have no noticeable symptoms, are incurable, and leave people infertile.
A man or woman who cheats on their spouse makes a mess of the lives of their whole family. Teenagers who have sex to feel loved end up feeling even more alone. An addiction to pornography hurts a boy’s ability to have a relationship with a real girl and harms the physical intimacy of a marriage. Much of entertainment has become about watching, talking about, and joking about sex. In living a life focused on sex, one misses everything else God has given us in an intimate relationship. Sex isn’t bad; God gave us sex. Two becoming one is a gift. In living a decent life, being committed to one person, one has less personal drama and emotional turmoil in their relationships, and increases the chance that one will have the blessing of a committed and healthy, truly intimate lifelong marriage.
Don’t cheat or steal. God has a plan for all of us. Some have more and some have less. When we take something that isn’t ours, cheat to get something we think we deserve or want, or work the system to get away with something, it loses its value. A student can get an A on a test, but still doesn’t know the material. That’s not a win. A person who doesn't work or pay taxes, but instead takes money from the government, is taking money that somebody else worked hard for. That’s not a win. The true win is when we reap the benefit of work and a job done well, and feel the pride of taking care of ourselves and those we love. Stealing is when we take something we didn’t earn or that God gave to someone else, or when someone takes something from us. When we follow God’s will, have integrity, and accept that He provides whatever we need, our faith grows, and more importantly, our trust in His provision grows. Our life gets better.
Speak well of people. We all know someone who walks around speaking badly about others. And we know that if someone’s speaking badly about someone to you, they’re probably speaking badly about you to someone else. Whether people do that to make themselves feel better or look better to someone, or to get people on their “side,” this behavior backfires. This behavior may make one feel good in the moment, but in the long run, it erodes trust and breaks relationships.
Whether child or adult, online or off, society today is full of mud-slinging. What people don’t realize is that lying, twisting the truth, calling names, or just using words to make others look or feel bad is something the devil does regularly and encourages. People who have isolated themselves with this behavior are very lonely. When we speak well of people, it increases positive feelings in ourselves, and our relationships grow. When we make a habit of putting the best construction on everything, we feel more positive about life in general. Nobody finds joy in living a life of negativity.
Don’t covet. Coveting is yearning for what others have. Spending too much time and energy wishing we had what somebody else has challenges us to appreciate what God has given us. This makes us insecure, erodes our trust in God's provision and will for our lives, and focuses our thoughts on material things. We may go as far as focusing our lives on the stuff we have or want compared to others. As Jesus reminds us in Matthew 6:24, “No one can serve two masters, since either he will hate one and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money." When we focus on being thankful for what God has given us and not what or how much others have, our lives are filled with less stress and more peace, contentment, and joy.
We are people who were created to be in relationship with each other. "It is not good for man to be alone." It’s been said that nobody is an island. We can easily isolate ourselves with our behavior, but we all yearn for connection and the feeling of belonging. We want people to know us, like us, and to be friends with us. These last seven commandments tell us how we can achieve that. God’s law is God's love.
If we shift our perspective and think about these laws as gifts to help us connect with others, our joy and contentment in this sinful world will grow. We aren’t saved by keeping these commands, we are saved by God’s grace. The Ten Commandments are a great gift. Trying to keep them brings us closer to God and other people, changing our lives from the inside out.
Laura Langhoff Arndt is an author and teacher of the faith with an MA in Classroom Instruction, and Director of Christian Education certification in the LCMS. She is the founder of the blog, Carpenter’s Ministry Toolbox.
Meet Officer Gomez, School Resource Officer
Remember when you got your first cell phone? Then your first smartphone? Or maybe you’ve always had a smartphone. Most of us never would have guessed that the devil would have one, too, and he’s got minions looking for and reaching out to your kids on social media and through downloaded phone apps.
Meet Officer David Gomez. He is a police officer and a school resource officer (SRO) in the Boise County Sheriff's Office in Idaho City, Idaho. He is also nationally recognized for his work in educating families about the dangers of online predators and cyberbullying. He is a great resource! Below is a comment from one of his followers on his Facebook page, which you can find here.
Posted on Facebook on 5/27/2025 by a parent.
"So, my daughter was/is the victim of an online predator. She’s officially considered an exploited child. Let me just tell you. We thought we had her phone on LOCKDOWN. No internet browser, no social media apps, no Snapchat, TikTok, Discord...NOTHING! She had to come to us for us to put in the password if she wanted to download something.
She had Roblox & some editing apps & some other silly games. He got to her on an editing app. An editing app she used to make K-pop & Roblox edits.
As soon as we found out I went straight to the police. Between SVU detectives & FBI they found him in less than 12 hrs. They got all they needed for state & federal warrants to be able to raid his house, seize all his electronic devices, arrest him, & have him extradited to our state. Today he had his arraignment in our state. He is being held on $25,000 bail. If by chance he makes bail, they will call us & if we don’t answer they will send an officer to our house to let us know. He is ordered to stay away from us & anyone under 18 if he does somehow post bail. I will be at his next hearing which is next month. This is where we will find out if it will go to superior court (which is what we want).
Since this has happened we have done everything in our power to make sure my daughter gets the proper help so she can process this properly & begin to heal. She does not see herself as a victim. She thinks she’s just stupid & an idiot. But let me tell you, I read through everything with the SVU detectives & these predators are GOOD at what they do. They are professionals. The grooming & coercion was sickening to read. In fact, I puked.
My little girl just turned 12 in November. This has been the HARDEST thing we have ever gone through & I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.
My point of sharing is this…Your CHILD doesn’t deserve privacy, your child doesn’t deserve trust, you know why??! Because it’s not about trust or privacy, it’s about keeping your child safe. They can’t fully comprehend what could really happen to them. Their immature brains live in the “that will never happen to me” world.
We EDUCATED on internet safety, predators, pedophiles, sending/receiving pics/videos…EVERYTHING. In the end, it didn’t matter because again…these predators are PROFESSIONALS at what they do. They know what to say, how to say it, how to make your child feel safe with them, how to build up trust with them, and ultimately…how to hurt them. The world is scary, but with the internet, it’s even more terrifying.
So, check your kid's phones every night, recover deleted messages/pics/videos, get BARK, be vigilant. It is not your job to be their best friend, it is your job to keep them safe! Prayers for all our children "
Some helpful information from one of my commenters. OG
Whether you're a parent or a grandparent, PLEASE SHARE THIS RESOURCE. Don’t think the devil’s minions aren’t looking for your children on social media or downloaded phone apps. Follow Officer Gomez here.
Encouraging Faith: THE SUMMER OF NO PLANS
Ever think about having a summer of no plans? IMPOSSIBLE? I don't think so. One of my favorite family memories is dinner. My mom drove us crazy because she made us turn off the TV, and when we did that, oddly enough, we started talking... to each other. The topics have changed, but to this day, we have great conversations during meals when we get together. We are a religious, philosophical, and funny family, and nobody would believe our crazy conversations or the bizarre things that were said, but through them, my parents were doing their part in making us disciples. One of my mom’s favorite summer phrases when we were young was, “Go outside!” Another memory, and one of our family jokes, is that whenever we put up our tent, it rained, and camping trips were our primary vacations. You know when great conversations happen and family bonding is in full swing? When everybody's trying to sleep in a tent while it’s pouring rain. "Don't touch the sides of the tent!" Everyone laughs.
So, here's an idea for your family this summer, and every summer. Set aside the structure, the event planning, constant trips for sports teams, organized game playing and classes, and the drive to entertain or keep your kids busy every minute. As a family, spend time together at the local pool, the cabin, camping, do the chores together, hang out in the yard, take time for disorganized game playing with friends or family, invite the neighbors or your teenager’s friends over to sit in the yard around your backyard fire pit, eat dinner on the porch, lay in the yard and look at the stars, take a walk after dinner, ride bikes, read books, play in the sprinkler, take time to pray together, spend time with church friends at the park or the lake, and hang out with God. Laugh together! Talk about anything and everything: about life, faith, the mysteries of the world, animals, God, the stars. Find out what your kids are thinking and don't lecture or correct. Listen. Respond. Talk. You may not see it, but they will be more relaxed, secure, refreshed, and ready for the next school year. The simple act of talking about faith will grow it in all of you. Remember, "where two or three gather in my name, there I will be." (Matthew 18:20) Also, you’ll find you have a household of greater peace and contentment. Making disciples doesn’t have to be forced conversations, formal programs, or structure. A bigger part of it is about life together, looking, listening, laughing, loving, and living... with God.
Borrowed with permission from The Carpenter's Ministry Toolbox.
The Importance of Free Play
Taken from The Anxious Generation, by Jonathan Haidt (pages 49-53)
Play is the work of childhood. Kids' brains are constantly learning as they experience the world through their senses. They should be playing energetically and often.
“In play, kids learn the skills they will need to be successful as adults, and they learn in the way that neurons like best: from repeated activity with feedback from success and failure in a low-stakes environment. When they’ve mastered these skills, they move on to more advanced multiplayer predator-prey games, such as tag, hide-and-seek, and sharks and minnows. As they get older still, verbal play – as in gossip, teasing, and joking around – gives them an advanced course in nuance, nonverbal cues, and instantaneous relationship repair when something they said fails to produce the desired response. Over time, they develop the social skills necessary for life in a democratic society, including self-governance, joint decision making, and accepting the outcome when they lose a contest.” People have a desire or drive to dominate or be in charge of others. As kids play, they learn to suppress that drive, which teaches them and gives them practice in being cooperative.
Children from birth to adulthood, yes, that includes high school, need FREE PLAY, which is defined as an activity that is freely chosen and directed by kids with no other goal than to do it. “Physical play, outdoors and with other children of mixed ages, is the healthiest, most natural, most beneficial sort of play. Play with some degree of physical risk is essential because it teaches children how to look after themselves and each other.” When parents, teachers, and coaches get involved, it becomes less free, less playful, and less beneficial. This is hard for adults, especially in our fear-filled world, as they usually can’t stop themselves from directing and protecting.
“In free-play, mistakes are made, but are generally not very costly. Gradually, from trial and error, and with direct feedback FROM PLAYMATES, elementary school children become ready to take on the greater social complexity of middle school. It’s not homework or study that gets them ready, nor is it classes on handling their emotions. Such adult-led lessons may provide useful information, but information doesn’t do much to shape a developing brain. PLAY DOES. Experience (unsupervised child-led play where children best learn to tolerate bruises, handle their emotions, read other children’s emotions, take turns, resolve conflict, and play fair, not information, is the key to emotional development. Because children want to be included in the group and keep the fun going.”
For research references, see The Anxious Generation book.
In Every Issue
Family Ministry Idea: See the above article, The Summer of No Plans
Family Prayer
Heavenly Father,
We thank you and praise you that we have the gift of time with our family this summer. We pray that we use our time as a time of rest and renewal for all of us. We ask you to send your Spirit to remind us to enjoy each other, to turn off our phones and all our screens, to give our children time for free play, and to spend time together, talking, laughing, and playing together. Finally, Lord, we ask that you be with us as we share our faith, learn about each other, and enjoy your gifts. We ask this in Jesus’ name, Amen.