Parents are the greatest influence in a child’s life… their WHOLE life. Especially when it comes to life choices and faith. It may seem easier during their younger years, and most parents may think that during the adolescent years kids may be throwing away what their parents taught them, but research shows that that isn’t
necessarily true. If you’ve talked to your kids and prayed with them while they were growing, they won’t forget what they heard as quickly as you might think. Teens are on a road to independence. They try new things and may explore other beliefs, but they are actually looking for confirmation outside the family of what they’ve been taught. If parents leave everything to the church, kids learn that their faith belongs in the church. If parents actively live and speak of their faith, kids learn that their faith is a part of their lives inside and outside of the church. How, then, do we equip parents to teach the faith to their kids?
The key is intentionality. If it’s not something that comes naturally in the family, parents need to make the effort to intentionally talk about their faith. If your children ask what you believe, can you tell them? Perhaps it’s time to get back into Bible study.
- Family devotions after dinner. It’s ALWAYS a good idea to read scripture or Bible stories! You can read a devotional book appropriate for the age of your children or just read the Bible and pause every so often to paraphrase what you’re reading so they understand it. There are some exciting things in there!
- Eating dinner together and discussing life. Turning off the TV, putting phones in a drawer, and talking about your day can be very enlightening. Kids say things to each other that give you insight into their lives and an opportunity for you to model and discuss appropriate behaviors, attitudes, and how Christ is a part of your family’s journey together, even at school.
- Praying before meals. Simple thanks for the day, for food, and for everything God provides… EVERYTHING is important for everyone! It changes what we think and feel about the stuff in our lives. Also, adding on prayers about life challenges or troubled loved ones to the end of our standard, “Come, Lord Jesus…” prayer is easy and only takes a few more minutes.
- Participating in your child’s Sunday School and confirmation education. Ask your younger kids what they learn in Sunday School. Talk about it on the way home and even later in the week. Some confirmation programs include parents as small group leaders or volunteers in another way. Do you know what your child is studying? Does your child come home with family discussion questions? One of the best benefits of parent involvement is that parents have the opportunity to rediscover things they probably haven’t thought about in a long time. Younger children also get a head start in understanding the information in Luther’s Small Catechism.
- Moments for meaningful discussion. Take advantage of opportunities for meaningful discussion of the sermon. Churches can provide a few simple discussion questions in the Sunday bulletins or have them printed, texted or emailed to homes after Sunday School. They may provide interesting dinner conversation starters or would be great while you have kids trapped in your car while driving places.
- Bedtime prayers. Teach and model for your children how to pray/talk to God by making their bedtime prayers personal to them. You can also say a simple blessing over your child out loud before they fall asleep. A child who hears every night that they are a gift from God, that they they have been given a strong faith, that they love the Lord and He loves them, that God has given them wisdom and good judgment to face daily challenges, that they are a blessing to their family and friends, and that they are reminded that the Spirit of God lives in them, that they wear the Armor of God to stand against anything evil that comes their way, and that the Lord goes with them and loves them, will sleep well and it will change how they face each day.
- Actions speak louder than words. They really do. Tell your kids what you believe, but show them even louder.
- Encourage questions. If your kids ask questions you can’t answer, tell them you’ll find out and call the pastor. When you bring it up again later they’ll see that it was important enough for you not to forget.
Parents can encourage or discourage faith. If your kids don’t hear it or see it in your life, it will most likely disappear from theirs. If your kids see that going to church and being in God’s Word is important to you, it will become important to them. Don’t give the world a chance to take away what you want for your kids.
Written and shared by Laura Langhoff Arndt, Carpenter’s Ministry Toolbox (www.carpentersministrytoolbox.com)